This week I have my first clinical placement, and I’m feeling utterly terrified at the prospect of donning my uniform for real, and starting to make use of the knowledge I’ve been collecting for the past 7 weeks.
I’m worrying that I’ll suddenly forget how to perform basic tasks – taking BP readings, counting resperationss, being able to walk without crashing into things… That my mentor might think I’m not good enough, or the placement will be too much for my brain to cope with. There’s a huge sense of vulnerability surrounding everything I’ve been doing for the past week or so, because it’s felt like this placement has been looming over me the whole time.
I’m also feeling really, really excited. I can’t wait to meet my mentor and find out what they’re like and how long they’ve been working; I want to ask what their favourite part about this amazing job is. I can’t wait to be with the women and their families, to do my best and strive to learn something new every day that I work. I feel so privileged and lucky to be getting ready for this amazing chapter of my life, and I’m feeling ridiculously grateful to have such a supportive network of lovely people surrounding me.
Stephanie posted about working with a student midwife this week, and I felt pretty emotional reading her words. So far, my journey to midwifery has introduced me to the most amazing individuals and helped me to see kindness in so many faces. There’s so much goodness in the world and I’ve often struggled to truly believe that, that is true. Now I feel that it’s almost stupid to feel so fretful about the staff at my placement, because my own experience has taught me that all the midwives I’ve met have been supportive, encouraging, inspiring and pretty wonderful human beings.
Thank you all for your well-wishes, support and endless kind words. You’re all amazing and I want to hug every last one of you! Wish me luck..!