Good morning friends, and happy Thursday to you all! This post is brought to you from the soft, drowsy lull that comes after a night shift, when my mind is full of everything and nothing, simultaneously.
I’ve been a little vacant from everything, lately. Since beginning at university last September, I know I’ve been remiss in contacting practically everybody in my life that I care about. I feel this more-so now, than I have over the past few months – the culmination of coming towards the end of my first year, and the realisation that soon I will be able to introduce myself to my mentors as a second year student midwife, is completely blowing my mind. I’m trying to be kinder to myself and my body now, something that I’ve briefly touched upon on my blog recently. It’s difficult, though, working 12 hour shifts and not often getting a break, and being inundated by essays and university work in my “time off”, see also: having an awful time resting because my brain is so full of what I’m learning and living, right now.
I haven’t mentioned here exactly how much I’ve been struggling – I’ve decided it would be best to quit, several times over, but each time I’m brought back by the love and kindness of the people around me, and the reality of the truly amazing experiences I’ve had in my journey to midwifery. When I was interviewed to become a student midwife, they told me that it would be difficult… But I never truly realised how difficult it would be.
So, here I am, eight months into my first year, a number of the ladies in my cohort have dropped out, and my friend and fellow student midwife Emily and I have been vowing to each other nearly every time we see each other, that we will get through this, and that two years and four months from now, we will be qualifying, and that we will be the best midwives that we can be. I have every intention of getting through these next few years and reaching the sunshine at the end of the tunnel – no matter how much anxiety, trepidation and fear is ready to attack me along the path!
Without further ado, things I love Thursday…
♥ Jack, who has been amazingly supportive through this journey so far, and is the best thing in my life. I’m so grateful to have found him, and to be lucky enough to wake up with him day after day ♥
♥ My mum, who is always there when I need a chat to get the things off my chest and need someone to tell me I’m doing the right thing ♥
♥My friends and family who are being so supportive and understanding of the fact that I’m not that great at communicating or socialising right now, and are giving me the space and love that I need none-the-less ♥
♥ Being able to work with women and their families, being able to say “hello, my name is Libby and I’m one of the student midwives”, being lucky enough to witness births and deliver babies and above all, being able to make a positive difference on people’s lives ♥
Thank you guys for your support, and getting to the end of my waffle. I hope you have a wonderful day, whether you’re working, on holiday, or having a sleep-day like me. Take care!